Episode 597: Reality Check

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Dave

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Zombie Cliche Lookout: Paralyzing Silence

As we all know, drawing zombies to you by making a lot of noise is a good way to get eaten. So naturally, you’re going to want to stay out of sight and as quiet as possible. The problem you might run into is misinterpreting the “as possible” part of that sentence. While you certainly shouldn’t be having loud arguments, or blasting your music, trying too hard to stay silence can be just as big of a problem.

Let’s say that you are, I don’t know, trapped inside a suburban home with a bunch of zombies outside. You can certainly try to keep quiet and hope the zombies lose interest and wander off, but what if they don’t? If you’ve been so worried about noise that you’ve neglected to barricade points of ingress, well, you’re probably about to have a really bad day. After all, zombies don’t tend to lose interest too easily.

About this Episode:

I woke up in the middle of the night thinking about this one. That’s right, sometimes this silly little comic disturbs my sleep. It’s okay, I don’t have a problem.

So what is it that bothered me so much? I realized that I was scolding these kids for dropping some lumber on the ground, when only a few minutes later a bunch of people were going to be pounding nails into the walls and making an ungodly racket.

With that in mind, the scolding really didn’t make a lot of sense, so I figured I should probably address it right in the comic.

Discussion Question: Survival Handicaps

A lot of people love to come up with zombie survival scenarios and talk about how they’ll get by. I’m guilty of this myself because, well, it’s a fun little diversion. Of course, most of us know that a zombie survival situation probably wouldn’t be as much fun as it seems, nor would we act and react as wisely as we do when our imaginations are controlling all the variables.

Preambles aside, let’s have a little imaginary zombie survival situation, but with a little twist. You have to choose a handicap. So, which of the following would you take if you had to choose one:

  • You start off with absolutely no supplies, and you aren’t even wearing shoes.
  • You have a sprained ankle, so movement is both slow and painful.
  • You are partnered up with a small, terrified child (please don’t leave kid to die).
  • You have severe food poisoning.
  • The only thing you have to drink is hard liquor, and the closest supplies are at least a full day’s trip away.

19 thoughts on “Episode 597: Reality Check”

  1. Typo alert, Zombie Cliche Lookout, second paragraph, third sentence:

    If you’ve been so worried about noise that you’ve neglected to barricade point of ingress, well, you’re probably about to have a really bad day. After all, zombies don’t tend to lose interest too easily.

    point–>points 😀

    That’s the only typo I could find for today, a fairly minor one at that! 😀

    • Fixed. Thanks!

  2. Barb’s line in panel two is a real gem: “Quit screwing around.” – shortly before she’s about to do a lot of hammering and screwing along with the rest of the group! 😀

    • That being said, if the cordless drill you’re using isn’t an early model, they can actually be a lot quieter than a hammer. I wonder if there would be any chance Dave’s zombies have suddenly developed super powers and can hear a mouse sneeze? 😀

      This also leads into an interesting Discussion Question: Zombies that have been in a zombie apocalypse for a certain length of time probably have developed some rudimentary perception of what is and is not food, irrespective of what sense it is picked up by. So what noises in a zombie apocalypse do you think would be less likely to attract zombies? Obviously if someone is running a loud fridge that’s never near anyone and is only being used to chill long-term food, the zombies are going to be perceiving that a lot of the time that particular fridge noise means there’s a really low chance of food ever being there. So, do zombies learn to prioritize sensory input, or do they just investigate everything, no matter what it is?

      • That’s a good point, although they only have two drills. Breaking out the hammers would definitely expedite things.

        Interesting question. I might just steal that one.

    • Hah; I hadn’t even thought of that.

  3. I’ll choose the hard liquor. Even though I hate alcohol, I’ll manage. After all, a human can survive a maximum of 3 days without water.

    • Careful! liquor will even dehydrate you more because it inhibits the creation of vasopressin. (look here for example: http://health.howstuffworks.com/wellness/drugs-alcohol/hangover2.htm )

      • Exactly why I picked it, Foolish. It could get very dangerous indeed.

  4. I would choose the kid cause that’s a bit of an advantage, as they can function as a second set of eyes and ears, a guard, and unlike pets can be easily reasoned with. Also I am a kid so…

    • Can be easily reasoned with? You know a different kind of kid than I’m used to.

      • Well the reasoning I’m going with here, if he/she don’t fear the “monsters” then darn it! he/she going to fear me! Catch my reference there.

        • No, I don’t. What’s that from?

        • You know in world war z arab guys going to Israel, also I am talking bout the book, aw phooey!

  5. What do you define as a “small terrified child”? If in that instance it meant I had food water and weapons I would definitely take my chances with a kid. Kids can be remarkably resilient and would learn what they needed to do to survive.

    • They certainly can be, but they’re also a lot of keep track of, especially if they’re being loud and drawing in the zombies.

  6. Since I’m out of shape so the Ankle and Food Poisoning would be worst case. I had food poisoning real bad once couldn’t walk or move and lost 14 lbs in 6 days.
    The small Child scenario would most likely be what I would be in. (3 daughters)
    I could do a couple of days on Hard liquor, I would just have to watch how much I would drink. So would consider this the best and easiest scenario.

    • You and I are in similar circumstances; I’ve also got a couple of old injuries, which wouldn’t help either.

  7. I would take the hard liquor. I would then evaporate off the alcohol. 😀